Did You Know Women Struggle With Porn Too

Sliding further down into her seat, the woman couldn’t believe her ears. She had been at the edge of her chair when the pastor announced that his sermon was going to address porn in the church.

Secretly, she had struggled with porn since her adolescent years, and for the first time, a glimmer of hope sparked inside. She had thought that today might be the day that she would learn a strategy to help her break free from the prison she had been living in.

All hope quickly dissipated when his sermon emphasized that men struggled with porn. She heard the statistics, “According to Pure Desire Ministries, 68% of church-going men struggle with pornography.”

No word was mentioned about the possibility that women struggled too. To conclude the service, the pastor announced that the church was going to start the Conquer Series, a 10-week series for men struggling with porn. “Great, they’re getting help. But what about me?”, she thought to herself.

Related Article: Why 68% of Christian Men Watch Porn

Similar scenarios are playing out in churches around the world.

It’s been a long time coming, but thankfully pastors and leadership teams are finally speaking out about the enormity of the problem that pornography brings. They are going beyond preaching an occasional sermon on the topic. They’re talking about how men become addicted, and they are emphasizing how these struggles are destroying marriages. Some are shining the spotlight on the connection between pornography and human trafficking.

But too often, society is turning a blind eye to the concept that women struggle with porn and sex addiction too.

Porn Is Everyone’s Problem

Millions of men around the world in over 100 countries have started their journey to a life free from porn through the use of the Conquer Series. These men are beginning to understand how their past painful moments are contributing to their present-day struggles. They are learning about the brain’s response to pornography and why trying harder will not work.

Related Article: This Is Your Brain On Porn

Men are rising up to become the godly men that they have been called to be by finding their true identity in Christ. And for the first time, they are learning that the struggle with pornography is not a will-power problem and it rarely has anything to do with sex.

Since the debut of the Conquer Series, we’ve received a lot of great testimonials from men who are experiencing healing, redemption, and restoration. Jerry in Michigan shared,

“Three years ago I began going through the Conquer Series for a porn addiction I’ve had for several decades of my life. God has broken the strongholds of pornography in my life! I have been free for over three years! He set me free, praise God, He set me free!”

As a team, we are always encouraged to hear of these success stories. But we recognize the importance of calling out the problem with porn as it truly is – everyone’s problem.

Ministering to only half of the church, in our opinion, can significantly delay revival. Why? Because we’re still keeping the door cracked open for Satan to enter in. We’re giving him permission to have his way in the hearts, minds, and lives of countless individuals. Remember, ignoring a problem will not cause it to disappear.

Instead, it creates space for escalation. And this is exactly what is happening in our society in regards to women viewing porn.

By The Numbers

By now, you may be thinking, “Exactly how many women struggle with porn? Is it honestly enough to sound an alarm?”. The short answer is yes.

One major pornography website reported that 35% of their regular site traffic in 2019 was from women.

The Barna Group reports that 15% of self-identified Christian women are viewing pornography at least once per month.

Beggar’s Daughter, a website devoted to helping women who struggle with porn addiction, shared that at some point, 87% of self-identified Christian women have seen pornography.

They also report that married women are more likely to watch porn than single women. While a lot of speculation can arise, could it be that these women are viewing pornography at the prompting of their addicted husband? Have they started medicating the pain in their lives by joining their husband, believing that if they watch it together, he’ll quit secretly surfing the web on his own?

What about single women? For many, they are trying to search for love that they have never been able to find. It is possible that they were neglected, rejected, or lacked a positive father figure. They may have been trained to believe that sexual abuse was love, or they may have perceived the message that their only worth comes from their bodies.

What Fuels Porn Addiction

We all have past wounds, reminders of critical words spoken into our lives, rejection, neglect, or abuse to some extent. Even those raised in amazing homes can typically identify areas of their lives that caused pain and heartache. Even though every person is created unique, the desire within to medicate this pain spans every gender, every religion, and every race.

When the Church ignores that the struggle is for both men and women, they are in effect adding another layer of guilt and shame to women who are already hurting. These women are being presented with a message that something must clearly be wrong with them if they are struggling with a man’s issue. But instead, we have to realize that all of humanity is broken.

Personal Testimony

I know I’ve been there. I’ve been the single female who read erotic novels, sought after pornography and had inappropriate relationships. I’ve been the wife who welcomed pornography into the bedroom.

I believed that if we were viewing it together, my husband would have no reason to view it in private. I know what it’s like to use sexual addiction to medicate a painful past. And I’ve seen how quickly pornography will completely destroy an individual, their marriage, and their family.

But more than anything, I know what it’s like to find healing and freedom. I can attest to the healing power of Christ at work in my life, not just on a personal level. I’ve watched as God redeemed and restored my husband as well. God not only rehabilitated our marriage but has made it stronger than ever. As a result of God’s faithfulness, our children also get to reap the rewards of our healing journey.

Related Article: How Wives Are Helping Their Husbands Quit Porn

Turmoil, tension, and low self-confidence no longer run our home. Instead, we are powered by love, unity, grace, and friendship.

And I believe that as God broke the generational curses off of my life and that of my husband, He was orchestrating generational blessings that will carry on to our kids, our grandchildren, and the generations to come.

Men & Women Can Be Set Free

I’m speaking out and breaking the silence on my journey. It is my prayer that today will be the day that you will do the same.

Here at KingdomWorks Studios, we recognize that there is a lack of resources available to help women who are struggling with porn and sexual addiction. However, we are currently putting a plan in motion to create a series that will directly minister to the hearts and lives of each woman who feels isolated and alone in their struggle. Please sign up to receive updates on this project. Also, recognize that waiting is not an excuse to allow women to continually suffer in silence.

Some churches have already started introducing women to the Conquer Series. Yes, some have labeled it as being too manly or “macho” for females. But I can speak from personal experience. It really gets to the core of what is going on inside of one’s mind, heart, and soul – regardless of gender.

Collectively, we must heal from all that hinders us from running the race set before us. Will this be the year that you’ll take a stand for your entire church, community, and every family you encounter? Take the time to organize and offer a Conquer Group for women. You’ll be glad that you did!

For more information on starting a Conquer Group for women, please contact us. We can be reached by calling (561) 681-9990