Your Relapse Early Warning Signal

Relapse

Pornography has wreaked havoc on a generation of people who grew up with the internet and are now coming into their twenties and thirties and relapse is becoming an issue.

At some point (hopefully) these men realize the destructive nature that pornography has on their lives and they begin a journey of trying to break free. To begin with, this can be a painful time, as most will try harder to just stop!

As Dr. Ted Roberts, host of the Conquer Series explains, “Trying harder doesn’t work…” What men really need is a deep understanding of God’s Grace, and a process.

Related Article: When Trying Harder Isn’t Enough

A process takes time, and men early in the process will find that they may experience relapse. Thankfully, there are some early warning signals that will help men identify a relapse before it occurs.

HALT

Relapse can begin weeks or even months before that dark day when we decide to ‘act out’ (act out can mean: masturbate, fantasizing, or viewing pornography).

HALT is an acronym that has been used by recovery groups to help addicts become aware of their emotions and predict relapse. HALT stands for ‘hungry, angry, lonely, and tired.’ These four physical conditions can make us irritable and amplify our desire for a ‘quick fix.’

Hungry

If you have ever heard the expression, “hangry,” then you will know how hunger can be linked to emotions. Addicts will often ignore their body’s desire for food, skip meals and be unaware of why they have become irritable, when they just need to eat and maintain a healthy diet.

Angry

Anger can be a trigger for a lot of men, especially when there are unresolved wounds from their childhood. For men who have been using pornography to medicate, they often won’t be aware of their anger until they attempt to stop and the un-medicated anger comes to the surface.

Recovery is often a process of learning how to deal with these emotions in a healthy way through resolving past trauma and regular exercise.

Lonely

Loneliness, boredom and isolation play a significant role in porn addiction. This can be because it is used to medicate feelings of neglect and abandonment. For some, even when they are around other people they can feel incredibly alone, because it isn’t just about being around people, but experiencing a level of intimacy.

Related Article: Man Dies Alone With Massive Porn Stash

Recovery in this area will involve taking part in recovery and discipleship groups, like a Conquer Group, as well as becoming more aware of God’s presence throughout your day.

Tired

When you are feeling tired, the logical, decision making part of your brain in your frontal lobe is not as responsive and you begin to react emotionally from your limbic system. This is why porn use will peak in the late evening – men are alone and tired with a lower likelihood of being caught.

In the Conquer Series, Dr. Ted emphasizes the need to have all electronic equipment off 30 minutes before going to bed. Phones can be recharged away from the bedroom and any online tasks not completed before 9:30pm can wait until the next day. Setting boundaries like this will make it easier to stand strong at your most vulnerable point.

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If you notice yourself in one of these situations, then be aware of your vulnerability and take steps to move towards a healthy response rather than medicating with pornography.

Picture having an awful day at work while seeing triggering imagery in the sidebar of an online News article. By nightfall, you’re at home and you feel restlessly tired—the kind of fatigue where you’re exhausted but can’t sleep. These kinds of thoughts and feelings are all that’s needed for a relapse to occur. Allowing ourselves to reach this level leaves us open to attack from the enemy.

Moving Beyond Relapse

Thankfully, millions of men are learning to respond to these triggers in a healthy way through the cinematic Conquer Series. The Conquer Series gives men tools to prevent relapse and find freedom from pornography.

Through the series we learn that we cannot face the battle for purity and find freedom from pornography by our own strength, we have to understand our desperate need for God’s unrelenting Grace.

With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible. – Matthew 19:26

We are also desperate for the community that God has created us for. Being in a Conquer Group, where you are meeting with men weekly and calling at least one other man every day, is essential for recovery. The other men in your group will be able to help you identify patterns in your behavior and uncover the triggers that most frequently lead to your acting out.

Related Article: Why Man Cannot Quit Porn Alone

Abandon yourself fully to God and allow Him to work through this process. You will become more aware of your triggers and be able to stand strong in the face of relapse.

Find out more about the Conquer Series by visiting SoulRefiner.com.